As many of you know, I lost my sweet Rob just a bit over 19 months ago. To date, all I have done with his things are to wash his bed side water glass, and put a few of his “out” things away, like his wallet, keys, and other things he packed on his belt and pockets on a daily basis. I put them away, so they did not get covered in dust or sun faded from the bedroom window. The only other things that are gone are the things I gave to his kids.
I think that Rob would understand how important that space would be to your efforts to preserve the dream that the two of you shared. Having the work space gives you potential income streams and makes maintaining the flock more efficient and every little thing you can do to ease the way forward is important.
Making that space a workroom is a good way to connect with the time he spent in there. I think that your courage honors his spirit and I hope you’ll feel surrounded by his love when you share that space.
Ah, I know that pain so well. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. My Ed died 15 months ago and I'm just now getting serious about clearing out drawers that were his but that I could use now. I looked in the closet the other day and was startled to see there were still shirts and pants in there when I thought I had cleared them all out. I was actually happy to see them there. I don't know when I'll ever pack them up now.
It does feel like erasing and I don't know how to get past that, either. Thankfully, Ed was not a pack rat. But the things he did have were important to him and now I have to struggle with what to keep and what to move out.
You've written this so beautifully. I hope you'll feel comfortable enough to keep writing whenever something is tugging at you. There are so many of us who can relate and we need to find ways of articulating that pain we're feeling. Reading your words can do that. Thank you.
I am so very sorry to hear you are going thru the same thing. I truly cant imagine much worse in this life, other than the loss of one of my children. I hope that you can find the solace to go thru your own trials with this new normal. I am glad we can support each other. Thank you again and I wish you many blessings.
I’m Cathy, Teri’s sister. You have 2 of my Colorado Mountain Puppies.
I’m so sorry about your loss, I can’t imagine your sorrow.
I have an idea. First, we are not defined by our stuff. Second, I know Rob would want you to have a safe space for your crafts.
I have helped countless people organize their spaces. If you want help, Teri and I can come up for a couple of days and help you with this seemingly impossible and emotional process.
I guarantee you will feel respected and listened to.
I had to move after Dan died. His things are everywhere in the new place and I carry a special reminder of him wherever I go. I don’t want to forget him and what he added to my life - ever.
Yes it was difficult , but I thought money was a problem. Memory care was so expensive and I didn’t know how long he would be there. I t was a tough decision, for sure.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss, I am new to your story but can feel your 💔 and wish I could ease your path. When clearing the hoarder home of a relative, I had the benefit of emotional distance, perhaps someone you trust could help vacate the space for you to repurpose, with you having final say on what would be discarded/kept? Best wishes, I truly appreciate your posts and will upgrade to paid next month, I over did for June already.
Thank you for your kind thoughts. I had thought of asking a friend for help, but to me it is even worse to have a stranger, even though my husband knew her well, going thru his things. I think it will just have to be a do it as I can manage kind of thing. Blessings to you
I think that Rob would understand how important that space would be to your efforts to preserve the dream that the two of you shared. Having the work space gives you potential income streams and makes maintaining the flock more efficient and every little thing you can do to ease the way forward is important.
Making that space a workroom is a good way to connect with the time he spent in there. I think that your courage honors his spirit and I hope you’ll feel surrounded by his love when you share that space.
Thank you. I'm just having big fights between my heart and my head.
Ah, I know that pain so well. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. My Ed died 15 months ago and I'm just now getting serious about clearing out drawers that were his but that I could use now. I looked in the closet the other day and was startled to see there were still shirts and pants in there when I thought I had cleared them all out. I was actually happy to see them there. I don't know when I'll ever pack them up now.
It does feel like erasing and I don't know how to get past that, either. Thankfully, Ed was not a pack rat. But the things he did have were important to him and now I have to struggle with what to keep and what to move out.
You've written this so beautifully. I hope you'll feel comfortable enough to keep writing whenever something is tugging at you. There are so many of us who can relate and we need to find ways of articulating that pain we're feeling. Reading your words can do that. Thank you.
I am so very sorry to hear you are going thru the same thing. I truly cant imagine much worse in this life, other than the loss of one of my children. I hope that you can find the solace to go thru your own trials with this new normal. I am glad we can support each other. Thank you again and I wish you many blessings.
Honor his room by using it, by feeling him around you every time you are there. Leave what you czn, add what you need. I love you
Love you more
can
I know you are not looking for advice- but having a place to weave can be so satisfying. You have to ask yourself, what would Rob want you to do?
I know he would be happy the space is used. It’s just my own head and heart fighting.
Hi
I’m Cathy, Teri’s sister. You have 2 of my Colorado Mountain Puppies.
I’m so sorry about your loss, I can’t imagine your sorrow.
I have an idea. First, we are not defined by our stuff. Second, I know Rob would want you to have a safe space for your crafts.
I have helped countless people organize their spaces. If you want help, Teri and I can come up for a couple of days and help you with this seemingly impossible and emotional process.
I guarantee you will feel respected and listened to.
Let Teri know if you’d like my help.
Thank you so very much for your kind words and offer.
I feel at this time that it is something I need to work thru and process at my own slow speed to help me deal with his loss.
I thank you. ❤️
I had to move after Dan died. His things are everywhere in the new place and I carry a special reminder of him wherever I go. I don’t want to forget him and what he added to my life - ever.
I’m so sorry you had to move. I don’t think I could have done that. Blessings brave lady
Yes it was difficult , but I thought money was a problem. Memory care was so expensive and I didn’t know how long he would be there. I t was a tough decision, for sure.
My heart hurts for you
I think you'll figure out how to share the room 😉
I hope so.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss, I am new to your story but can feel your 💔 and wish I could ease your path. When clearing the hoarder home of a relative, I had the benefit of emotional distance, perhaps someone you trust could help vacate the space for you to repurpose, with you having final say on what would be discarded/kept? Best wishes, I truly appreciate your posts and will upgrade to paid next month, I over did for June already.
Thank you for your kind thoughts. I had thought of asking a friend for help, but to me it is even worse to have a stranger, even though my husband knew her well, going thru his things. I think it will just have to be a do it as I can manage kind of thing. Blessings to you